Music Monday: "I'm Not Who I Was" by Brandon Heath

Week 2 of Music Monday and the next song that I found that inspires me is Brandon Heath's "I'm Not Who I Was". A few years back I allowed myself to be led by my ego and away from the Christian life I'd been raised to follow. I hurt a lot of people but most significantly I hit bottom where my choice was either to end it or renew my faith and move forward toward the life God wanted for me. As you can see, I chose the latter and found a church family where I was able to rededicate my life to Christ and His work. Now when I get thanked for doing something, I know it's not me. I'm just a vessel and blessed to make the impact on others' lives as I work to share God's love for us all. Some people may feel that a cheater, a liar, a thief, etc. never change and I used to feel that way, but today I can actually faithfully and honestly say "I'm Not Who I Was". While I know through His blood, Christ has forgiven me but one day I hope that I can earn forgiveness from those I've hurt in my past. Songwriter: Brandon Heath I wish you could see me now I wish I could show you how I'm not who I was I used to be mad at you A little on the hurt side too But I'm not who I was I found my way around To forgiving you Some time ago But I never got to tell you so I found us in a photograph I saw me and I had to laugh You know, I'm not who I was You were there, you were right above me And I wonder if you ever loved me Just for who I was When the pain came back again Like a bitter friend It was all that I could do To keep myself from blaming you I reckon it's a funny thing I figured out I can sing Now I'm not who I was I write about love and such Maybe 'cause I want it so much I'm not who I was I was thinking maybe I I should let you know I am not the same But I never did forget your name Hello Well the thing I find most amazing In amazing grace Is the chance to give it out Maybe that's what love is all about I wish you could see me now I wish I could show you how I'm not who I was

Music Monday - "Why Can't We" by the Isaacs

In the first of my new series of "Music Monday" I'm starting with a powerful song by The Isaacs that has really touched my heart. The song takes a meaningful look at forgiveness, not just of others but of ourselves, asking if God can let go of all our mistakes...why can't we?

Throughout my life, I've struggled with past mistakes, wishing I could take them back, wishing I could start over. I can't go back, but through God's grace, I can start over knowing that despite my mistakes, He still loves me even when others have abandoned me. He hasn't given up on me even though my human failings don't make me worthy. He makes me worthy. So though I will always be plagued by those past demons, I can learn to forgive myself.




Written by Jimmy Yeary, Sonya, Isaacs, and Rebecca Isaacs Bowman, the lyrics to "Why Can't We" are:

"He lies awake there all alone most every night

Looking back on all of his mistakes
Wishing through the tears that he could just go back
'Cause there's a lot of things he'd like to change
He just can't forgive himself and forget
Even though God already did

If He can love someone and find the good within
In spite of what they've done, no matter where they've been
If He can let it go and set the debtor free
If He can keep forgiving you and me
Why can't we

There've been times I've been so hurt by someone else
I didn't wanna give a second chance
I let all the bitterness take control
And took grace into my own hands
But even Jesus said, "Whoever's done no wrong
Let him throw the first stone"

If He can love someone and find the good within
In spite of what they've done, no matter where they've been
If He can let it go and set the debtor free
If He can keep forgiving you and me
Why can't we

He was hated and rejected, betrayed by those He trusted
Even hanging on the cross, He said, "Father, please forgive them"

If He can love someone and find the good within
In spite of what they've done, no matter where they've been
If He can let it go and set the debtor free
If He can keep forgiving you and me
Why can't we

Why can't we"

Book Review - Out of Hiding by Rachel Dylan (5 Stars)

Out of Hiding by Rachel Dylan
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Actually I was going to grade this a 4 ½ stars out of 5 but can’t decide if what’s bothering me is just a pet peeve or really a plot hole so I gave the author the benefit of the doubt and rounded it to 5 stars.

Before we get to that issue, let’s talk a little about the plot. PI Sadie comes across a missing teenager who just might be a victim of a human-trafficking ring run by the man who killed Sadie’s parents resulting in her being put into WitSec for the last twenty years. She teams up with FBI agent Kip Moore who is working the human-trafficking ring but doesn’t know of Sadie’s connection to the ring leader. Yup, lots of tension here.

First, we’re praying for the missing teenager’s rescue before something bad can happen. Then, the author has us worried about how the ring leader’s family feud will impact our hero/heroine. Then, we find out the DEA has been running its own investigation on the family without the FBI’s knowledge. Then to top it all off, the ring leader finds out who Sadie really is. Yikes!

If I didn’t have an ulcer before then I would now. Geez, talk about putting the couple through the ringer.

Now back to the issue I had. Several times a foster care group home was mentioned as possibly a place that the human-trafficking ring was getting its girls but there was no resolution to this. Maybe I was supposed to imply with the rounding up of the ring in Mexico that the group home was also taken care of, but it just felt like a plot hole that wasn’t resolved. Maybe the author plans to use this for a sequel. *grin* That sure would make me happy.

I have to admit I had to keep reminding myself Ms. Dylan was a debut author. Not the normal “It’s a debut author, so I need to...” whatever concession I come up with. This author writes like a long-term author and I had to keep telling myself to slow down and enjoy it because she didn’t have any other works out there for me yet. (Hopefully, it won’t be long *wink wink*)

I can’t remember another debut author that automatically made it to my auto-buy list after the first book. Yes, several debut authors may have gotten a “I might try them again” out of me but Ms. Dylan has found herself a fan for life.


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Book Review: The Doctor's Devotion (Eagle Point Emergency, #1) by Cheryl Wyatt

The Doctor's Devotion by Cheryl Wyatt
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Cover Blurb:  When he fled Eagle Point years ago, former air force trauma surgeon Mitch Wellington left only broken dreams behind. Now he's back with a new dream—opening a trauma center in the rural area and saving lives. He hopes to hire the quick-thinking nurse who impressed him during an emergency. But Lauren Bates lost her faith and doesn't believe she deserves to help anyone. Mitch knows firsthand what loss feels like. And it'll take all his devotion to show Lauren that sometimes the best medicine is a combination of faith, community—and love.

After losing a patient and becoming disenchanted with her former profession as a nurse, Lauren Bates decides to open a sewing shop with a friend in Texas. But when her aging grandfather needs her, she rushes home to Illinois for the summer.

Enter former Air Force trauma surgeon Mitch Wellington, who has returned to rural Eagle Point with the dream of opening a trauma center and saving lives. Mitch has heard a lot about Lauren from her grandfather but she’s not comfortable with how close the two men have gotten in her absence.

When Lauren accompanies her grandfather and Mitch to the ribbon cutting for the trauma center, she learns just how important this center is to the area when a major emergency occurs. Short staffed, she must put aside her fears and step up to help those in need. Despite her low self-esteem due to the past tragedy, Lauren’s skills as a nurse totally blow Mitch away and he starts pursuing her as a nurse for his trauma center.

Of course, things don’t stay strictly professional and attraction develops between the two as the summer progresses. But things aren’t all wine and roses for the couple. Lauren’s commitment to her friend in Texas and Mitch’s dedication to his new trauma center mean they could torn apart before they truly get a chance to explore this relationship.

Ms. Wyatt’s has an uncanny ability to convey the growth of these characters, both spiritually and emotionally, makes this book very hard to put down. Her characters endure realistic struggles of loss, broken promises, money issues, etc. and make them all the more relatable to the reader. She puts them through situations that test their faith and make them set up to the plate just like we have to do every day of our lives. The plot is well thought out with multi-dimensional characters that will keep you engaged and intrigued.

P.S. There is a specific part of the story where I could almost hear Kenny Chesney singing in the background about his tractor. It’s a very amusing scene and just more evidence of how Ms. Wyatt can draw her readers into the story. Well done!

For more on Cheryl Wyatt and her books, check out her site at http://www.cherylwyatt.com

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Book Review: Police Business by Julie Miller (Book #2 in the Precinct Series)

Police Business by Julie Miller
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

From Ms. Miller's website: "Police Business Book #2 in the Precinct

Cop in Shining Armor

While investigating a reported crime, Detective A.J. Rodriguez discovered there wasn't a trace of any murder having been committed! But hearing-impaired heiress Claire Winthrop insisted she'd stumbled upon a slain employee in her father's high-rise building and claimed she could ID the hit man. Although the lack of evidence pointed to an open-and-shut case of a pampered socialite clamoring for attention, A.J. sniffed a deadly cover-up. Powerfully drawn together, the street-tough lawman soothed the shell-shocked princess with a tantalizing kiss that bewitched both their hearts. However, when A.J. pulled Claire into his dark, dangerous world, he knew he'd better stick to police business---or the killer could permanently silence his beloved witness . . ."

Ms. Miller penned a great mystery here that had you guessing until the end. Her ability to take the little things we (as hearing individuals) take for granted and spin it into a comprehensive, complex story was just amazing. And the players involved – the father, the uncle, the security chief, the secretary, the temp – they all had me second guessing myself at every turn about what happened and whodunit.

If you’ve been reading the Taylor Clan/Precinct series from the beginning, you’ll recognize A.J. as youngest Taylor brother Josh’s partner from The Rookie. I had pegged A.J. as sort of the serious workaholic compared to Josh’s more laid back temperament but I didn’t realize until this story just how far it went. You get to see who Josh and A.J. work together in the Prologue for this story if you didn’t get to read the other.

His father had been trying to tell A.J. something was going on at the company where his father worked as a janitor but it didn’t weigh high enough on rebellious teen A.J.’s list of priorities at the time for him to be concerned. Then his father is murdered and his whole life is flipped on its axis.

A.J. straightens out his life and becomes a cop but he hasn’t been able to bring his father’s killer to justice. When the Fourth Precinct receives a call from the very company his father used to work for, he figures this might be his chance.

When he gets there, he finds the owner’s daughter, Claire, claiming she witnessed a murder. Only there’s no body. No blood. No evidence at all that a crime has been committed. Even when the woman Claire thought was murdered calls from vacation to say she’s fine, the seemingly pampered socialite doesn’t change her story. Only there seems to be too many people in her social circle trying to pressure her to do just that.

Did she or didn’t she see someone murdered? Is this murder related to what happened to his father? What would the killer do to Claire when he realized he’d left a witness?

If I told you the answers, you wouldn’t read the book. And if you like ultimate suspense and mystery with a healthy dose of tender romance and awe-inspiring love, this is definitely one you’d want to tag for your TBR pile. Pick it up now at Amazon and check out Ms. Miller’s site for more information on these books and more.


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Book Review: Partner-Protector by Julie Miller (5 Stars)

Copyright © 2005 by Harlequin Enterprises Limited

A Cop's Crusade . . .
Detective T. Merle Banning vowed to conduct the Holiday Hookers homicide investigation based on cold, hard evidence, not psychobabble from the department's "crackpot" consultant. So, despite their smoldering attraction, he scoffed at Kelsey Ryan's unsettling visions of one of the murders. But even he couldn't discount the truth when Kelsey provided a break in the case that had stymied the Fourth Precinct for years. As their pursuit of the twisted killer led them down the seedy back alleyways of Kansas City, the flamboyant beauty bewitched T's battle-scarred heart . . . and propelled him to breach her isolated world. Could these partners in passion unravel the killer's web of darkness before it ensnared them both?

(Description Quoted from Ms. Miller's Website)

Thanks to a very generous Christmas gift from my brother (and Kindle), I was able to finally read the original Precinct Series. I’ve read Vice-Squad, SWAT, Brotherhood of the Badge, and currently on Task Force but somehow I missed the series that connected the Taylors to the many Precinct series that followed.

First off, if you read the Taylor Clan series, you’ll recognize Merle as Ginny Rafferty (now Taylor)’s partner from the 2^nd book in that series, Sudden Engagement. Mitch Taylor from the 1^st book in that series, One Good Man, also plays supporting role in this book. If you didn’t get to read those books, don’t worry because this book can stand on its own, but if you want to check them out, they are well worth the read and you can pick them up on KINDLE by clicking on the links above.

For those who did read Sudden Engagement, Ms. Miller does a fabulous job of continuity from that book on several fronts. First, Merle is still nursing his ‘crush’ on his partner Ginny which becomes an obstacle for his relationship with Kelsey. Second, he was injured at the end of Sudden Engagement, and the after effects of being shot are continued through this book with various mentions of the stiffness, etc. And lastly, Ginny and her husband Brett Taylor are now expecting a child which has put Ginny on bed rest leaving him open to be paired with Kelsey on the Holiday Hookers case in the first place. None of these things are intrusive on the current book, but as a reader, I find it nice to be able to catch up with some ‘old friends’.

Now that I’ve spent half the review talking about a previous book, let’s get into this one…

Merle is a cop. Kelsey is a psychic. If you’ve seen any TV police dramas, you know these are not a good combination and the cops I know would laugh in your face if you told them a psychic had information on a cold case murder they were working on. Either that or they’d place the psychic at the top of their suspect list. And that’s exactly what happens between Merle and Kelsey.

At first, all Kelsey can tell him was something happened somewhere and she felt it had to do with the Holiday Hooker murders. But with little more than that, Merle sends her packing with a pat on the head and a smile (not really but from the way he brushed aside her concerns, I’m sure it felt that way to Kelsey…lol). Of course, her bright red hair and eclectic clothes gave me an image of a female Ronald McDonald, which couldn’t have helped.

Undeterred, and knowing the ‘spirits’ won’t leave her alone until she solves what happened to them, Kelsey begins searching on her own. After letting a little bit of what Kelsey said sink in and realizing her clues where better than nothing, Merle follows. Unfortunately, he can’t do anything to stop her car from being stolen, although it does lead to a moment when I couldn’t help but think ‘if she’s really psychic, why didn’t she see her car being stolen?’ LOL. Ms. Miller doesn’t bring that up since she’d already expressed Kelsey’s ‘powers’ are not that kind but more of a feeling/impression she gets from touching things. Still someone had to say it. J

Maybe if they’d found the car, she could have touched it and ‘seen’ the person stole it. Hehe. Though I must admit it was more fun having Kelsey reliant on Merle to get home and Merle having to ‘deal’ with her as instead of bemoaning the loss of her car, she goes to work volunteering at the homeless shelter across the street.

If this had been a Christian fiction story, I would have thought that the inclusion of the homeless shelter was a plot device to add some kind of Christian message to the story. But knowing Ms. Miller’s writing, I knew she’d be sharing some pretty important things connecting the shelter to the Holiday Hooker killings. Ms. Miller did not disappoint.

In addition to each of the murder victims having spent time at the shelter, Ms. Miller gives us not one but two potential suspects: the shelter director, who seems devoted to the homeless and the shelter but leaves the impression he’s hiding something, and the drunk doctor at the shelter who is more than a little peculiar. A third suspect turns out to be a cop whose beat includes the area around the shelter but seems a little too friendly with the low-lifes in the area. Or could the killer be the local pimp, Zero, upset that the murdered hookers were honing in on his girls’ territory?

Ms. Miller does an excellent job at leaving red herrings and keeps you guessing until the end. The suspense stays high throughout with Kelsey ending up in danger from practically every direction. The relationship between Kelsey and Merle develops so well from an adversarial friction to a passionate partnership that is just so beautiful, especially for two people seemingly so different from each other.

Partner-Protector is definitely another keeper from Ms. Miller and I can’t wait to be able to read the rest of this series. If you want to pick up a copy for yourself, check out AMAZON or visit Ms. Miller’s website at www.juliemiller.org for more information on newer releases what she’s working on, contests, and more.

Book Review: "If You Know Her" by Shiloh Walker

If You Know Her by Shiloh Walker
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

BACK COVER: "A SHADOW IN THE WINDOW

Nia Hollister doesn’t scare easily. She’s returned to Ash, Kentucky, with a vengeance—and with a mission: find the killer who brutally ended her cousin’s life. What she didn’t count on was trembling with desire every time she sees Law Reilly. If any man can help her escape the nightmares for a while, it’s him. But can she allow herself to take comfort in those strong arms when her sister’s killer still roams free?

She may think she’s a bad ass, but she should not have come back to his town. He is watching her—as she slips into Law Reilly’s house, as she storms into the sheriff’s office. These men won’t be able to protect her when her time comes. Timing is everything, though he can’t wait forever. She’s nosing around the woods, looking for his hiding place. Yes, he is watching her . . . through the window . . . in her bed . . .

If she’s not scared, she should be . . . because he is very good at what he does."


Shiloh Walker’s “If You Know Her” is part three of a series but the first of her books I’ve read. It won’t be the last. Despite not reading the first two, I had very little trouble catching up with the story and figuring out who was who in the fictional town of Ash where the series is situated.

I read of A LOT of series books from Julie Miller’s Taylor Clan/Precinct and the HQN Fortune Children (and the relative subseries of both) to the Fitzgerald Bay mini-series and Camy Tang’s Deadly Intent series. With series (and others) I tend to find the authors either lean toward providing a lot of background information about the previous books so a new reader to the series doesn’t get lost or providing just the barebone information on the previous books to entice the new reader to look for those books as well. Either way the run the risk of alienating returning readers by boring them with information they already know or of confusing the new readers by not giving clear enough background.

Ms. Walker didn’t fall into either of those categories. Throughout the first couple of scenes she dropped in little tidbits of information regarding the previous books and characters so that it was almost undetectable.

First Nia couldn’t sleep because she was thinking of her dead cousin and how she just couldn’t accept that her murderer had been found. It hinted at a previous run in with Law so the tension would obviously be there.Something was still nagging her. The writing here is so good, the anxiety level so palatable, I want to reach for a cigarette with Nia and I don’t smoke! LOL

Then in the very next scene, you find out she’s right. While it’s told from the killer’s point of view, Ms. Walker doesn’t reveal who the killer is just yet. Still it shows that the killer is just as antsy as Nia about her cousin’s murder. He knows some other guy took the fall for her sister’s murder but he still wants to get out there. The need to kill is still there but if he does locally he’ll be discovered and he can’t let that happen but Nia just won’t let up. The more she seeks out answers the more the killer fixates on her, intent to make her one of his victims.

The suspense throughout the novel kept me hooked until the end. Maybe if I’d read the other two in the series, I might have picked up on the killer earlier but the reveal was so expertly written I can’t complain. Ms. Walker is a fabulous author and her stories are well worth the money spent.

Now before you think this review is all wine and roses, I have to admit there was one point in the story I put the book down and almost didn’t pick it back up again.

About midway or two-thirds of the way through the book, Law and Nia come across the killer’s lair. Grisly images. Photos of the victims. Everything you’d imagine you’d find in a sick and sadistic torture room of a serial killer. Law, of course, being the chivalrous hero tries to shield Nia from the images but her stubborn streak won’t let her be coddled and she sneaks a peak as soon as Law’s out of the room.


For any person, images like that are almost as torturous to the viewer as it was to the person in the picture. When it is someone you know, it makes it even harder. My initial problem here was instead of lashing out, crying until no more tears could come, etc., Law and Nia have sex.

Yup. Steamy, no holds barred, hotter than lava sex.

At the time, it was a total turnoff for me. How could they be even thinking of sex when they’d just seen what they saw? I didn’t get it. I’m not a prude or anything but lost interest in what happened after that. Sex is fine. Even a lot of sex is fine. But the sex has to mean something. A growing connection between the characters. A development in the relationship.

Well, even though I’d put the book on the shelf and planned to donate it the next time I took a bag of books to the library, the story just wouldn’t let go of me. And one night watching a rerun of the TV series “Criminal Minds”, a lightbulb went off in my head.

I don’t remember the exact words but essentially the character said something along the lines that each member of the BAU team had something to help them escape the horror of what they see everyday. Something that helps them reconnect with humanity. Baseball. A butterfly collection. Family.

That’s when it hit me. The sex between Law and Nia wasn’t just sex. It was a reconnection. A need to feel something other than pain and grief. Because of their established deep attraction to each other, the sex was intense and hot but the emotional balance obtained by connecting with another human being made it so much more.

With that in mind, I went back to the book and read that section and came out of it feeling much better about their physical relationship as well as their long term prospects. That connection with each other made them much more believable, in my opinion, as being able to have a fulfilling relationship after the end of the book.

So, while I had a hiccup or two with reading the book, overall Ms. Walker did a fabulous job at providing the suspense, tension and romance needed for this story. I would definitely consider her a must read.

For more on Ms. Walker as well as her extensive booklist, please visit http://www.shilohwalker.com/
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